Who needs Nickolodeon Cruises, Disney or Breakfast with Mickey when you can travel the Midwest with my Boys? I was going to write ONE blog entry about my great adventures in Ohio with Johnny and his brothers but the size of that entry would rival only War and Peace so……….. I believe it is best written in several editions.
When we would visit Ohio when the boys were smaller, most of the time was spent at the home of family and friends “visiting.” Now that everyone is a little older, this does not cut it. BORING………yeah, that’s the word I think I heard.
On this visit I planned to delight them with field trips to all the great places I went to in school. We hit the Dairy (which funny enough has a putt-putt golf course), a Nature Center, Ohio Caverns and Johnston Farm. All fun, inexpensive and gauranteed to make Johnny yell, I’M TIRED WHEN ARE WE LEAVING!” And his new favorite……..”THIS IS BORING!” Let me tell you, he is a real JOY to drag around the state……..actually, not really.
Our first stop was the Dairy. Which, as I mentioned, has a putt-putt golf course. Fun, right? Well…….not always. Johnny declared this, “THE STUPPIDIST GAME EVER”, then propped his club against a tree and abandoned us on the course. Little Brother is not so quiet…….and has a MEAN competitive streak. His quest for winning was not helped by having one arm in a complete cast. He delighted us all by throwing his golf ball into the parking lot screaming THIS STINKS, then throwing his club on the ground and JUMPING up and down on it. Yeah…………a real proud Mommy moment. Good thing he is a light weight or I would have been the proud honor of a mangled putter. And we weren’t in my hometown………..so…………….just maybe, just maybe, nobody noticed the equipment flying across the course. Hey……I can dream.
Our next destination was Ohio Caverns. This was a definite field trip destination back in the day. The brothers thought the stalagtites and stalagmites were so cool and were really in to seeing the “gems” and rocks in the gift shop. Johnny, however thinks looking at rocks is for schmuks and was more interested in trying to find “Batman in the Bat Cave.” Just our luck we did have one bat sighting. Thus while the brothers were in the gift shop planning how they were going to get rich by mining for gems, Johnny approached me at the shop with his FIND.
I turned around to see my Johnny, (did I mention he has a penchant for mild curse words?), who said:
Look MOMMY, I’m the ANGEL FROM H**L
Who needs Disney Land, right? Mickey Mouse has nothing on my “Angel”, Batboy! How much do you think people would pay to have “Breakfast with Batboy?” Now…….that’s a GREAT IDEA! Pancakes anyone?